Monday, June 11, 2012

"All work is half done when the women are not involved" - Mahatma Gandhi

This quote is on a huge sign at the Ashram and I read it everyday... it is a lot more meaningful now that I have been surrounded by amazing women. First of all, I'm sorry that my blog posts are so unorganized and all over the place, and SOOOO long!! I don't blame you if you skim, the only people that I really picture reading the entire thing are my mom and dad haha BUT, I will briefly mention all of what has been going on as of late- which is a LOT, so bare with me. I would start in order, but I wanna start by talking about what happened to Emma and I recently. This last Wednesday, we went to our NGO to work. The day before, Vijay, the coordinator for the scholarship program (this is called the Bala Shanti (Children's peace) program which gives scholarships to village children so they can go to school), came up to Emma and I and said "would you and Emma like to go to a village tomorrow and hand out scholarship to children and adults for this year?" OF COURSE I said YES. So, on Wednesday we got in a car with another field coordinator (ok, let me tell you about her-- her name is Thangakkili, which means golden parrot... haha she is SO cool. She is single and has a serious deformity on her leg which does not allow her to walk upright, so everytime she walks, she has to lean forward, pick up her left leg and hobble- this does not stop her from being a leader, and a field coordinator at that. She speaks very little English, but she loves Emma and I, and everytime she wants us to do something, she says "hello, hello, please come" haha it's the best. Anyway, we arrived at the village and to get to the meeting place, we had to go uphill. It was a little hike and Thangakkili was tired, but we eventually got there!! Once we did, there was a group of women and girls sitting there. They looked so beautiful and they just stared at Emma and I when we got there. I said "wannakam!" which means "hello" and they all smiled and said it back to me! They always smile and often times laugh when we attempt to speak Tamil. Well, they started to hand out the scholarhsips and the women and little girls in a very neatly and organized matter, came and got their envelopes. One of the most interesting things in my opinion, about these small villages is how they live together, being of different religions. Hindu women, Muslim women and Christian women all interact with one another. So, at the end of the handing out of scholarships, I noticed a group of Muslim women sitting there and I couldn't resist-- cuz I have always liked Muslims-- and I jumped in to take a picture with them! They were laughing so hard, but as soon as the camera goes up, they don't smile! haha it's so funny. Anyway, as we were heading back, one of the Muslim women brought her little 2 yr old daughter to see us! It was so cute because she was blowing us kisses and saying "Asalamu alaykkum" (not correct spelling) which is an Arabic saying that Muslims use that translates to something like "peace be with you". Then, the mother invited us to dinner at her house and Emma and I told her that we would LOVE to go. We are so humbled and honored that these women are so friendly and giving and always want us at their houses. They are always smiling at us and they just want to make us happy. It is so sweet. They kept telling us how beautiful we were, and I wonder if they know how beautiful THEY are to us. We are excited to go to her house and I will write about it when it happens. I wanted to briefly mention the Woman's workshop that happened at the Ashram a few weeks ago. All of these women from different villages came to the Ashram, they are the leaders of their self help group, so they came for a workshop on leadership. They were taught what characteristics a true leader should have, etc. My favorite was this woman who spoke about confidence. She told the women to be confident in themselves, that they each had abilities and characteristics that made them unique and special. That no matter when others told them that they would not succeed, they should be courageous and keep trying. This all sounds like Young Women lessons, but these women needed to listen to this. After it was over, Emma and I had the opportunity to interview some women and ask them about their favorite part of the workshop and without fail, ALL of then said "I liked the confidence speech, it helped me feel like I could go and start another self help group, or try to get another loan and start my own business. It made me feel like I could actually do it, no matter the obstacles". And the obstacles are many. Just from a month and 2 weeks here, I have seen how some women are so underappreciated and demeaned. Yet, after this workshop, I saw that many of them left with this newfoung confidence, and it made me so happy. These women are the perfect leaders. Something else that stood out to me about the workshop was another woman who spoke about taking care of oneself. I never thought this would be a problem... but the women here are SO devoted to their families. Their children and their husband are their TOP priority (all of these loans and self help groups and everything that they do, is for the sake of their children). This is wonderful, until the women are so devoted to their families that they forget about themselves. This may not be such a visible problem where I am from, but here in India, especially rural India, it is. Women get exhausted and sick, because they work so hard for their families. So, what they lady said was: "If you have four bananas, what do you do? you give the best one to your husband, the next best two to the children, and the worst one for yourself. DON'T DO THIS! take the best one for yourself, you deserve it". I know it may sound a bit selfish to those who may not understand how the women are here, but to me, it was exactly what these women needed to hear, because they DO deserve it, and they shoudl be able to care for themselves as well. It was such a great workshop, and it was so humbling to be able to sit side by side with these leaders, and learn with them (although let's be honest, I learn way more FROM them).